Peak Minimalism: The Infinitowel

Minimalism is about reducing items. That’s why we’re introducing the only one you’ll ever need.

Do you frequently lose your possessions? Do you feel like you keep buying more things that you don’t need? Wish you had fewer items that could handle more tasks?

Don’t panic.

We’re excited to announce The Infinitowel — the ultimate multitool for every minimalist. Our team spent months in the lab perfecting an innovative new design for what we believe is a revolutionary universe altering multitool device. Purchase one here:

Become a pro in your world with the Infinitowel Multi-tool.

The 101-in-1 artisanal linen fabric device contains all the essentials for performing a magic trick, detecting wind speed, holding a bouquet, wrapping a burrito, going undercover, and hundreds more! Folding neatly inside your pocket, this minimalistic artist-crafted cloth sheet is perfect for anyone, from the inquisitive adventure-seekers to the inventive, dedicated home-makers.

Minimalism is about reducing items and living life with less clutter. With The Infinitowel, you need only one item for all the uses you could ever imagine. Here’s just a short list of them:

  • Canvas
  • Tug of War Rope
  • Baby Sling
  • Molotov Cocktail
  • Bull-Fighting Towel
  • Creating a Parody Website
  • … and many more!

Purchase one here:

What’s this all about?

We’re selling a normal hand towel.

Is this real?


Can it actually do the things you say it can?

It’s a towel, so, sure?

Are you making a profit?

We earn under $0.50 per towel, which we will use to get ourselves a life.

Why are you doing this?

There have been a proliferation of minimalist-focused multi-tools. We believe we have found the best.

What gets wetter the more it dries?

Shut up.

Subscribe at the bottom of our website to see how this experiment goes. Created with a dry sense of humor by David Zhao and Stephen Cognetta.

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